Relationship

They say communication is a two-way street, but the same is true for every aspect of a healthy relationship. Trust, admiration, appreciation, support, and empathy are all forms of energy that partners give and receive. When that energy only flows in one direction, though, they risk falling into a one-sided relationship.  When the dynamic only allows one person to receive, it traps their partner into the role of the giver. The imbalance in emotional labor […]

To be or not to be, for better or worse, in sickness and health… binaries often come up in the ways we talk about love. The topic of dependence is no different. In most relationships, there’s tension between who we are as partners and individuals. Luckily, there’s a model to help us find a balance – interdependent relationships. If co-dependence and independence are on opposite ends of the spectrum, interdependence is that golden zone that

Even the healthiest relationships ebb and flow. That glimmering spark when you meet someone for the first time? It won’t last forever, and it may be particularly elusive in decade-long marriages.  Because of this, it can be hard to identify whether your bond is in a rut or if it’s coming to an end. Of course, love isn’t the only factor that buttresses a connection between two people. Still, if one person falls out of

Find something you can validate in what the other person is saying and receive their perspective like someone that you love and respect. Why is it so important that your partner feels exactly the same way as you do???? “It’s ok and expected that couples will not agree and that conflict will occur. Not just on politics but on likely many aspects of their relationship. CONFLICT IS NORMAL! People can have the same political view

When couples get married, nothing can match the excitement of a lifetime together. For many, marriage is a commitment built on connection, trust, and admiration – the culmination of a loving, vibrant relationship.  However, as time goes on, those heady feelings can turn into distant memories as the toll of daily life takes over. When passion fades, even the most loving couples can find themselves in a rut.  Luckily, there are ways to avoid the

According to the National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS). 1.68 million people got married in 2020. In that same year, 630 000 filed for divorce and annulments. These figures are down from previous years due to the pandemic, but they reveal something interesting about the nature of long term marriages and gray divorce. Divorce is a trying and turbulent time for every couple that goes through it. The effects can feel even sharper for couples

How would you define self-care? (Trying to explain how it’s not so much about baths and pedicures as it is about caring for yourself as a human and prioritizing your mental/physical/emotional needs.) Anyone who is in a relationship in which you seek to be able to take care of the needs of others requires that you invest as much time and energy into your own care as you give to the people you love. Self-care is

Fall/winter is usually pretty low energy in general, and although we know socializing is good for us, it can be tougher to self-motivate to get together with friends. Is it normal to feel like you have less energy to give to your platonic relationships when the days are shorter/darker, and why? During fall and winter, most of us settle into a “wintering” or nesting frame of mind, spirit, and body. For some people, the production

Working through issues together is a healthy sign in a relationship, but what happens when there isn’t a tidy solution? While navigating conflict is a normal part of being in a relationship, some problems are unsolvable. This begs the question: how should you deal with a problem you can’t fix? Well, it helps to know how common this actually is. According to Dr. John Gottman, unsolvable relationship problems can make up two-thirds of a couple’s

Co-dependency is a behavior that is often developed in childhood as a response to growing up with caregivers who were inconsistent with their attention or support. When children don’t have consistent parental behaviors that can be relied on or feel conditional, they often develop coping skills that place the needs of the adults above the child. Children develop these responses in order to survive childhood and as a way of trying to keep in their